Tag Archives: power of a praying wife

The Power Of A Praying Wife -His Protection

“Our husbands are on the battlefield every day. There are dangers everywhere. Only God knows what traps the enemy has laid to bring accidents, diseases, evil , violence, and destruction into our lives. Few places are safe anymore, including your own home. But God has said that even though ‘The wicked watches the righteous, and seeks to slay him, the Lord will not leave him in his hand’ (Psalm 37:23,33). He promises that He will be ‘a shield to those who put their trust in Him’ (Proverbs 30:5). He can even be a shield to someone we pray about because of our faith.” (The Power of A Praying Wife, Page 107)

I pray for my husband’s protection every single day. Now this does not come from my holiness, but from my anxiety. I am constantly afraid that my husband is going to get into a car accident on his way home, or that someone is going to rob him at the bank while he deposits his checks after teaching music lessons at night. My anxiety about losing my husband used to be worse. When we were first married, if he was even 5 minutes late coming home from work my mind would start imagining the worse. By the time my poor husband walked through the door, I would be a mess, usually in tears and mad at him for not calling me to say he was going to be late. Most of the time it was traffic or a taking a phone call when he was sitting in the drive was when he got home that caused the delay. No car accident, no major head trauma, no gun shot wounds. Just life.

It doesn’t happen often, but sometimes the fear of losing him will creep up at night when I’m waiting for him to get home. His schedule can be a little irregular and he could be an hour earlier or later than I expect. He is usually so good to call and let me know what is going on, but sometimes it slips his mind. (I pray for the Lord to remind him to call me too!)

It’s funny that at this very moment, my husband just came into our room where I’m writing and says he’s going for a run to end his workout. It’s almost 9:30 pm. I still get a little anxious when I think about what could happen. But the Lord has been impressing on my heart to trust Him with my husband’s life. My husband also just said, “I’ll only be gone like six minutes. I’m going to leave my phone here.” The look on my face must have changed his mind because he grabbed his phone and smiled at me before he closed the door.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if God protected us from anything that could harm us?! I would never have to keep watching my clock to see when six minutes have passed!

But there are times when God doesn’t protect us from the evil around us. Bad things happen. I love what Stormie writes about this in this chapter.

“But accidents do happen, even to godly people and when they do they are sudden and unexpected. That’s why prayer for your husband’s protection needs to be frequent and ongoing. You never know when it might be needed in the battle field. And if something happens, you’ll have the comfort of knowing you’ve invited God’s presence and power into the midst of it.” (The Power Of A Praying Wife, Page 108)

That last sentence brings me such peace. When I read it I feel God’s peace wash over me and I feel calm. He is ultimately in control of my husbands safety and I have to trust Him. He is worthy of my trust.

 

 

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The Power Of A Praying Wife – His Health

“For years my husband cared little about exercise. I would give lectures and meaningful talks, leave magazine articles in his path, and plead and cry about how I didn’t want to be a widow, but it all fell on glazed eyes and deaf ears. Then one day I got the brilliant idea that if praying worked for other parts of his life, it might work for this, too. I decided to employ my ‘shut up and pray’ method and ask God to give him the desire to exercise regular. I prayed for a number of month without any results, but then one morning I heard an unfamiliar noise coming from another room. I followed the sound and much to my amazement, it was my husband on the treadmill. I didn’t say a word. He has been using the treadmill and lifting weights about three days a week ever since.” (The Power Of A Praying Wife, page 103)

I could have written this passage. When my husband and I were first dating, he weighed 315 pounds. He lifted weights, but did no cardiovascular exercise and the years he spent in college eating out every day took its toll on his body. His weight gain started back in junior high and continued through college. Being overweight and picked on, he became the funny guy, always throwing out jokes before people had time to make fun of him. His sense of humor was one of the things that attracted me to him. I was also attracted to his frame. I love that he was big and made me feel safe when he held me or when we were out in public. There is something comforting when you are with the biggest guy in the room. 🙂

Mike and Stacy heavy 4 001

After we had dated for a while and I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with this man, I started to pray about his weight and health. I looked down the road and imagined us having children and him not being able to play with them because of his weight. I imagined being widowed because he had a heart attack. We had a few conversations about his health and I assured him of my reasons for wanting him to lose the weight – it wasn’t that I was not attracted to him, it was that I was scared, scared of losing him. One day he decided he didn’t want to be fat anymore. I was so proud of him! When we got engaged he started losing some weight. He lost about 30 pounds before we tied the knot. His suit was way too big on him on our wedding day; I had to pin it back with a chip clip for pictures.

mike weight loss wedding

After we got married, he continued to lose weight. Over the course of about four years, he lost a total of 130 pounds! It really helped that I try to cook as healthful as possible and encourage him to keep at it. In the last month or so he has started running at least 3 days a week and is in the best shape of his life. He started running to support me since I took a leap of faith and am training to run a 5K. He knows the difficult task I’ve set before myself (If you are not familiar with my story or disability, check out the About Me page!) and he has stepped up and supported my running by jumping in with me! I love to watch him with our son; sometimes it make me emotional remembering my fears about him not being able to keep up with our future children.

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I do realize that this may not be the case with your husband. Your husband may not be interested in losing weight or taking care of himself. Don’t give up! Keep praying and try to include him (and your whole family!!) in activities that promote good health. Take family walks, challenge him to a game of horse on the basket ball court at the park, join a gym together and ask him to help you tone up. He will probably be excited to be able to show off his big muscles and his knowledge of weight lifting 😉 (Ask him to walk with you on the treadmills while you are there!) Have him help you pick out healthy recipes you can make together or tweak your existing ones to make them healthier. But above all, PRAY! Another point I want to touch on, one that Stormie also mentions in this chapter is health that is out of our control. My husband has tinnitus (Tinnitus is the medical term for “hearing” noises in your ears when there is no outside source of the sounds. The noises you hear can be soft or loud. They may sound like ringing, blowing, roaring, buzzing, hissing, humming, whistling, or sizzling.) This creates big problem for my husband since he is a musician. He also has Tendinitis in his wrists (Tendinitis is inflammation, irritation, and swelling of a tendon, which is the fibrous structure that joins muscle to bone.) and it causes so much pain sometimes that my husband can’t use his hands. I pray that the Lord takes away these diseases, takes away the pain and discomfort from my sweet man, but as Stormie writes,

“Remember, however, that even though we pray and have faith, the outcome and timing are God’s decisions. He says there is ‘a time to heal’ (Ecclesiastes 3:3). If you pray for healing and nothing happens, don’t beat yourself up for it. God sometimes uses a man’s physical ailments to get his attention so He can speak to him. Keep praying, but know God’s decision is the bottom line.” (The Power Of A Praying Wife, Pages 104,105)

I understand how hard it can be to pray for healing and have God answer with a response we don’t want. I’ve been praying for healing for myself for over 11 years. God’s answer has always been “no” and it’s so difficult at times. I write this because it’s easy to give advice about praying for healing when it doesn’t intimately affect you, so I want you to know that what I write comes from a place of quiet desperation for healing, for both myself and my husband. We do our very best to take care of our bodies because we know so much of our health is due to living in a fallen world and I feel that I am responsible to doing everything I can to live as healthy as possible and keep on keepin’ on when God’s answer for healing is “no”. I am praying the Lord gives you comfort in those times when you so desperately want good health for your husbands and it just isn’t happening whether it’s due to your husband’s choices or just living in this world where sickness and disease is a sad reality. Keep praying, keep seeking the Lord, keep keepin’ on. 🙂

“Lord, I pray for Your healing touch on (husband’s name) Make every part of his body function the way you designed it to. Wherever there is anything out of balance, set it in perfect working order. Heal him of any disease, illness, injury, infirmity, or weakness. Strengthen his body to successfully endure his workload, and when he sleeps may he awake completely rested, rejuvenated and refreshed. give him a strong heart that doesn’t fail. I don’t want him to have heart failure at any time. I pray that he will have the desire to take care of his body, to eat the kind of food that brings health, to get regular exercise and avoid anything that would be harmful to him. Help him to understand that his body is Your temple and he should care for it as such (1 Corinthians 3:16). I pray that he will present it as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to You (Romans 12:1).” (The Power Of A Praying Wife, pages 104,105)

The Power Of A Praying Wife – His Purpose

The timing of me reading this chapter is perfect (Isn’t God wonderful about things like that?!) because in just a couple hours, my husband and I will be meeting with our pastor about my husband’s role at the church. Currently he is the Worship Pastor. He was ordained a few weeks ago and there have been talks about him moving into more of an associate pastor role, still overseeing worship ministry. We have been praying about this role change and have been blessed by the clarity God has brought to us. You see, we know there is a call on my husband’s life to full time pastoral ministry. But what that looks like exactly, we are not sure. Right now, he is a music educator, both at a school (teaching k-12th grade music, including drum line, recorders, elementary band, and jazz band) and teaching private music lessons, a Bible teacher, a PE teacher, and a Children’s Pastor, teaching chapels at his school. Plus, he is a Worship Pastor and is finishing up his seminary degree. He is stretched thinner than thin and he is worn out. I can sense an unrest starting to rumble in my husband. He believes he is where he needs to be at this point, but cost of living is going up and his salary isn’t. We can’t do this for much longer. The Lord has shown us that. Now…what to do about it? We don’t have any idea. We are waiting on the Lord to move and being faithful in the work he has called us to do.

Stormie writes,

 

“If I’ve learned anything being married two and a half decades, it’s that a wife can’t pressure her husband to BE something, but she can pray for him to become it.” (The Power Of A Praying Wife, Page 93)

 

I’ve pressured my husband about finding a new job, just one job, a better paying job, a more fulfilling job, the job I think he should have. How do you think that went over? Yeah, you can imagine. I am ashamed when I think back on some of the conversations we have had. I was trying to help, trying to show him how much I thought he was worth, trying to encourage him to find his purpose. He left the conversation feeling defeated, worthless and angry. Definitely not the results I had hoped for. I’ve had to ask for the Lord’s and my husband’s forgiveness on more than one occasion.

 

“How do you feel about what your husband is doing with his life? Do you lack peace about it because he is on a path that is unfulfilling, beating him down, or going nowhere? If so, then pray, ‘Lord, take my husband from this place, reveal to him what You’ve called him to be, and open doors to what he should be doing.'” (The Power Of A Praying Wife, page 94)

 

I’ve learned I just need to pray. He knows how I feel. I don’t need to do the woman thing and tell him a million times. He’s not stupid; in fact he’s brilliant, and he knows he’s worn out. He probably feels the same way I do, but he has chosen to lay it all at the cross and let the Lord work in His timing. We are praying together now that God would reveal His purpose for my husband’s life. Things are so much better when I keep my mouth shut regarding this issue. We are still in the financial situation we were in before, but there is peace in our home. Before, there were financial struggles and strife in our home. Not fun at all. I love the prayer above. I will be incorporating it into my prayer time for my husband.

I also thought this paragraph was great.

 

“Whatever God has called your husband to be or do, He has also called you to support it and be part of it, if in no other way than to pray, encourage, and help in whatever way possible. For some women that means creating a good home, raising the children  being there for him, and offering prayer and support. Other women may take and active role by becoming a partner or helper. In either case, God does not ask you to deny your own personhood in the process. God has called YOU to something, too. But it will fit in with whatever your husband’s calling is, it will not be in conflict with it. God is not the author of confusion, strife, or unworkable situations. He is a God of perfect timing.  There is a time for everything, the Bible says. The timing to do what God has EACH of you to do will work out perfectly, if it’s submitted to God.” (The Power Of A Praying Wife, page 95)

 

As we pray for our husband’s purpose, let us also pray how our purpose fits perfectly with his. For me, creating a good home and raising our son and being there for my husband is my purpose; when our son is older I will be able to play a more active role in my husband’s purpose of ministry.

To everything there is a season,
A time for every purpose under heaven.

Ecclesiastes 3:1

 

 

The Power Of A Praying Wife – His Temptations

“Temptation is everywhere today and we’re fools if we think we or our husbands can’t be lured by it in some form or another. The Bible says, “They eyes of man are never satisfied” (Proverbs 27:20). If that’s true, temptation is always a possibility and we must be ever watchful. Certain people are tempted by alcohol and drugs; others have a lust for money and power. Still others find food addictions, pornography, or sexual immorality to be irresistible lures  The enemy of our souls knows where our flesh is the weakest and he will put temptations in our paths at our most vulnerable points. The question is not whether there will be temptations, it’s how we will handle them when they arise. I recommend praying through them. While prayer may not be able to stop a man from doing something he is determined to do, it CAN diminish the voices of temptation and strengthen his resolve. it can pave the way for him to make right choices.” (The Power Of A Praying Wife, page 76)

 

After talking with my husband about this, I realized that the things men struggle with or consider temptations are very different than what I think women (or at least myself) struggle with. I think Lust tops the list for men. God created men to be visually stimulated and since so many women lack modesty, this can be a huge temptation for them. It doesn’t work that way for most women so it’s not something we think about much. For myself, I think about this often because I know my husband stands on stage every week leading worship at church and he has mentioned to me how distracting it is when there are women wearing inappropriate clothes to church.

I’ve heard so many women say that it’s not their problem and that guys just need to get over it. It doesn’t work that way!!! Our husbands have a choice as to whether they are going to give a woman a second look, but  Satan (and their flesh) can plant thoughts in their minds with the innocent first look. My heart is so heavy for our husbands! I know my husband is faithful; he does everything he can to avoid temptation, but IT IS EVERYWHERE! We need to be in constant prayer for our husbands!

If you husband is struggling with a particular temptation and he tells you about it, please resist the urge to be angry at him. He obviously doesn’t want the temptation and he trusts you enough to tell you he is struggling. Become his partner in fighting it! Talk about it, pray about it together and let the Lord work to strengthen your husband to avoid the temptation! If he has fallen to the particular temptation, continue to pray. Stormie writes,

 

“I know several couples who have experienced adultery in their marriages, but because in each case there was a wife who was willing to pray and a husband open to allowing God to change and restore him, the marriages are still intact and successful today. Only prayer, a submitted heart, and the transforming power of the Hold Spirit can work those kinds of miracles.”(The Power Of A Praying Wife, page 75)

 

If you feel overwhelmed by your husband’s fall, you don’t have to pray alone. Please talk with your pastor’s wife or another godly woman. It may also be necessary for you and your husband to go to counseling together. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. The Lord can work miracles in your marriage. Keep praying!

 

Stormie also writes, “The best time to start praying about this is BEFORE anything happens. Jesus instructed his disciples to ‘pray that you may not ever into temptation’ (Luke 22:40). He said be watchful because ‘the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak’ (Mark 14:38). If your husband struggles in a certain area, pray that he will want to have godly prayer partners with whom he can share openly, be accountable, and receive prayer.” (The Power Of A Praying Wife, pages 76,77)

 

This is awesome advice! Pray, pray, pray!

And because we can’t really ever pray for our husbands without examining ourselves also, I’d like to touch on a few things we should consider. While I was reading this chapter, I was reminded of the Esther study I went through a couple years ago by Beth Moore. There was a particular part of the study when she talks about mean girls. The video below is the segment I am talking about. Take a few minutes to watch it and then jump below for the rest of my thoughts.

Now, when I was younger, there was a time when I would have been considered a mean girl. I dressed in a way that would put men’s attention on me. I didn’t really care if the men had girlfriends or wives; I enjoyed the attention dressing immodestly brought me. I was longing to be loved and this was how I was able (in my mind) to attain it. This was a dark time in my life. And guess what? I was a Christian! I loved Jesus, but I was hurting and not trusting Him to be everything I needed to be loved.

Beth Moore is right when she says we know exactly what we are doing when we dress to get men’s attention. Knowing my husband struggles with this area (pretty much ALL men do, married or not), I have become passionate about modesty! When I put my clothes on in the morning (or afternoon! LOL…mom of a toddler here!), I look in the mirror and evaluate my outfit. I know I will be bending over to help my son about a million times a day. Do my breasts show when I bend over? I evaluate the fit of my clothes. Tight-fitting clothes, even when breasts are covered up, can trigger the same arousal in men. Is my skirt too short? If I feel particularly sexy in an outfit, I will change. I can save those outfits for dinner dates at home with my husband. Some woman may say I am over-reacting. I vehemently disagree! Our bodies are for our husbands alone. We all want to feel attractive, and that’s just fine, but when we know our outfit may cause a man other than our husband to possibly think sexual thoughts, that’s a big problem! Imagine if all women felt the way I (and so many of us modesty enthusiasts) felt. There would be a lot less tempted husbands out there.

Now, I realize sometimes it’s hard to find modest clothes that are still cute. Designers make clothes that will sell. Sex sells. But there are some great solutions for this problem. I love love love that longer shorts and capris are back in style now! I also love a good maxi dress. Cardigans are my favorite piece of clothing to keep my shoulders covered up. I also buy camis from a company called http://www.modesty4me.com. You can receive $3 off your first order with this discount code: SS445. Check them out!

Let’s continue to pray for our husbands and do everything we can to avoid being a temptations for other women’s husbands. Amen?